Friday, April 8, 2011

New Zealand: Home of the World's Most Boring Reality Shows

I've been watching New Zealand's version of Cops for twenty-three whole minutes, and I have yet to see one shirtless person slammed on the ground.

Friendly, Baby-Faced New Zealand Cop:  Hullo sir!
Crazy and Extremely Drunk Homeless Person Living Under a Bridge:  GHHHraaaah?
Cop: We've gotten reports of you...well, exposing yourself in this area, sir.
Homeless Man: Fraaaaah!  I's yuh, takin' a *bleep* piss!  Whassa gotta?  Man can't....blubblah!
Cop: I see.  Well, unfortunately that's called indecent exposure, and it's against the law.
Homeless Man:  Rah..I frahm 'a.  Yes, I understahhr.  Wan hap' eegin. 
Cop: Well, glad we've gotten that all cleared up.  Enjoy the rest of your day.
Homeless Man:  Glashoota!
Narrator: You never do quite know what's in store for a day in the life of a Highway Patrol!

And if that wasn't completely terrifying enough, we now see a man arguing with another officer about whether or not he can walk his dog down the freeway.

This is why you never want your country to be too nice.

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